You know you're in Saudi when...

When you land in Riyadh it is so obvious as to where you are for the following reasons:

1. The air is so dry you have constant nose bleeds.

2. For miles/kilometers you see nothing but sand, sand and more sand.

3. Every man walking is wearing a white robe with red checkered head dress and you start to think it looks pretty comfortable given the 47C degree day.

4. The black ghosts you see walking silently are sporting a beautiful set of eyes through the 2 cm opening and you wonder who is under that thing.

5. You see the women (black ghosts) toating all the luggage and children at the airport while the men are only carrying a brief case.

6. It's 10:15pm and you are still waiting for a client to show for a dinner appointment, who in actuality is only 15 minutes late due to traffic.

7. You have an audience with HRH Prince XXXX, the King's brother, and you are the only foreginer in the receiving room and all the white robed men are staring at you, wondering why you want to see him.

8. Through out the day you are interupted with hypnotic hymns wailing from the mosques and the entire country stops to pray but you.

9. And the most obvious reason you know you're in Saudi is when you are at a restaurant and are handed a cocktail menu, the specialty of the house, mojitos, doesn't list a drop of rum.

10. Inshala!

All Alcoholics, Listen Up!

For all the alcoholics in the room, you don't need to say who you are, you really need to come to the Middle East. It's a cleansing place where one can rid themselves of the toxins of the drink. Flush your body with a glass of fruit juice, then another glass, then another since that is all that is served here. This isn't intended as a colon cleansing, remember why you are here, it's about your love of the drink.

Yes, if you are really serious about giving up the buzz, get on a plane and head to the the land of sand.

The Underdog, The Unexpected...The Winner!

I may have been living under a rock, or at least in Bangkok or even Tokyo for that matter but I have just heard on the news the latest sensation to hit the show Britain's Got Talent. Now I know you may have heard of this already and forgive me for being behind but I can't get enough of this underdog winning and making such an international sensation.

Youtube has just with one posting over 25 million views of her audition for the show. There are many that are posted and all of them growing in clicks and views.

It's the feel good moment of the week when the Bangkok city streets were erupting with Dan the Man reporting and the economy still in the dumper, then comes Susan Boyle.

Feel good about this moment for her and for the world.

CNN's Dan Rivers is a big girl!

When it comes to reporting, Dan Rivers is a big girl. There I said it again.

I know it must be quite scary to be in the center of a riot and not really know what will happen next but let's ask ourselves the true question, why was he there?

Is Dan Rivers there to be dramatic and help the ratings for CNN by sensationalizing the reports? Or is he there to give a factual report of a political situation that has erupted in to public unrest?

There are many facts that he left out or sensationalized this weekend. Here are two that were favorites of mine that stuck with me:

• He reported that the Army was firing AK-47 rifles into the air and at the crowd of demonstrators. The Army actually used blanks or "paper" bullets - he forgot that little point.
  
• He used the term Molotov Cocktail Bombs repeatedly in his segments, sounds so much more dramatic than gasoline bombs, the term used by the BBC and ABC.

I understand if you are on the street and start to hear the sound of machine gun fire, that would unnerve the most experienced of reporters, with the exception of Dan Rather maybe. But unlike the BBC and ABC (Australian Broadcast Corp) who actually reported that they were firing blanks, Dan the man kept reporting about the gun fire, leaving the blanks part out. Didn't the lack of bloodshed and lack of dead bodies on the street raise a question in his mind?  Maybe he thought we wouldn't ask that question.

The BBC and ABC reporters, who were also located amongst the chaos, were factual and not over dramatizing the situation; I give them both a lot of credit. Dan on the other hand, not so much.

On another note, Dan who is ever diligent in the pursuit of sensational journalism, gave the impression to the world that the entire city was under siege while clearly mentioned by the BBC and ABC, in the rest of the city, outside of the government house areas, the Thai people were celebrating the Songkarn New Year water festival.  Making their only New Year wish that the world see Thailand as a peaceful nation so that life can get back to normal for everyone.

Red Shirt Tea Party

What would you do for a thousand baht?  What would you do for a thousand baht a day?  What would you do for a thousand baht a day including food and water?...and a red shirt?  For your knowledge, a thousand baht is US$30.  That is what the Red Shirt party is offering to protestors who come and fight the cause for them regardless of their political position.

The bloody Red Shirt protestors have once again fucked up this country and are taking it down all for $30 per day.  While the leaders of the game have changed from the November 2008 government over throw, the protestors have not.  They are the same up country folks who normally make $15 a day wages while they farm or work in factories.  With the exiled Prime Minister pulling the strings and funding the war, why not shut down the country that provides just $15 per day to the majority of its people.  Even $30 is better, no?

If only they realized that CNN and all the other national television news stations from around the world are covering their 3rd world government overthrow.  Making the country look out of control and a place on par with the Republic of Georgia.  And who in their right mind is going to Georgia right now?

Would everyone just settle down and wait for the next election please.  We may not like our leaders but we don't try to club them to death and chase them through the building.

Happy freakin' Easter!

Another Songkran Holiday

Well it's that time of year again.  Yes, the time when we defend our cell phones from the adolescent terrorists who roam the streets of Bangkok celebrating the Thai New Year.  They search for potential targets then soak them up with jasmine scented water from the "Super Soaker" type squirt guns they carry so blatantly in the public eye.

Yes its Songkran time!  Time to beat the heat of Thailand by taking in a bit of cool wetness and maybe being chucked into a pool when you walk past and expect it the least.

Tourists beware!

Did I mention the advert for Miss Songkran pageant?  All men welcome.